First cane for the son

Dec 30, 2005 - that's the day, when I "caned" my son for the first time. It was for an "offence" most people would probably find that the "crime" do not warrant the punishment - the habit of biting finger nails - and so I caned him once on each hand.

We tried telling him and explaining to him the harms of biting finger nails - to no avail. We tried scolding him; we tried grounding him and traking his privilleges to toys and tv away from him; we tried putting him in the corner (we started isolating him in corners since he was 1+ and old enough to understand discipline. very effective and it works); we smacked his fingers (till our own hands hurt); so next step was to go for the cane.

I have searched through the web for solution to getting him off the habit and most recommend putting on some bitter lotion/cream to discourage him. Will prob try looking in the local pharmacy stores and see. but so far 4 days on, he has not picked it up yet..... hope it worked.

But it was an equally painful experience for me, as I inspected his hands 10 minutes on (as I helped brushed his teeth) and I saw the reddish, cane-inflicted mark on the hand. It wasn't the tears or the sight of his winched face that disturbed me most but the sight of the mark and his recovered composure to "win back" my love that left the guilt and made me most traumatic of the whole incident. brave kid - 10 mins on, and he was smiling at me and trying to cuddle me. Although the mark left after about 30mins, I couldn't sleep well that night. I remembered the time my own dad caned me for leaving the car keys in the car and locked the whole family out while out at a relative's home. It was a very painful experience for me .... and I now know how difficult it was for my dad to do that too.... but I never left the keys back in the car ... ever again.

I hope I will not need to raise the cane on my son again. But if I have to, I pray that I may have the courage to do so - for the sake of my children.