Joshua back with family

Last night, my wife and I were both happy and sad to see Joshua "re-uniting" with his family, as Jonathan are able to return home to rest after spending the last 4 weeks in and out of the hospital. It was great to see the four cousins playing together and especially to see Jonathan being himself smiling and enjoying playing. It was great to see him reunited with his family as they drove off from our house. We can almost sense the happiness as you look into his eyes as he walked into the car.

The sad thing would be the thoughts that he would have to leave his family again when Jon returns to the hospital for more treatment. We can only take each step as it comes, cherishing the rich moments of being together. We pray that he will understand and will find the courage to be strong - God has, after all, named him Joshua.

Jonathan smiling

I saw Jonathan smiled for the first time in what seemed to be a long long time since he smiled. And His mother, Joanne, was even more fortunate to see him smiled an ever bigger smile and even managed to captured it on camera. If I can feel the smile warming my heart, I can imagine the kind of healing it brings to his mum and dad.

The simple ways God chooses to bless us are always the best and most often taken for granted.

Jonathan Update 11 July 2006

Dear praying partners,

The second session of chemo has completed. There is a mild fever which the doctor said is a little worrying. And blood pressure is still high. Do pray that the pressure would stablise. The blood pressure reading might not be accurate as everytime the nurse takes the blood pressure Jonathan will be struggling and crying. Generally, Jonathan is well though he is not as alert as last week as the chemo is taking it's effect. These few days he will be under observation. He is still eating and has been in better moods the past few days.

If there is no major complication, Jonathan would be discharged either Thursday or Friday unless the doctor decides that he goes on a dose of antibiotic for the fever.

The doctor came to check and advise that he will do a through check of Jonathan condition in about 10 days time to see if the tumor is operable. If the doctor decides that Jonathan is ready for surgery, then arrangement will be made for Jonathan to transfer to University Hospital as the facilities there are better and the surgeons there are more experienced in handling these cases.

Do continue to pray for speedy recovery. Joshua is still staying with Michael and Celia. Do pray for Joshua as he is beginning to miss home with requests to go home emerging more frequently. The initial enthusiasm of playing with his cousins are beginning to wear off.

Also, please pray for favorable working arrangements between Lawrence, Joanne and their respective employers.

Prayers

Jamie said her first prayer several weeks ago - a simple "Jesus, thank you, Amen" ...

And

this week, I hear Joshua said his first prayer where he thank God for helping his brother Jonathan and prayed that he wil lcontinue to help Jonathan well again. 5 full complete sentences including praying in Jesus' name...

After weeks of praying with the children before bed, it was so nice to hear them saying their own prayers - Johua, Jeremy and Jamie...

Sometimes, to our embarassment, when we with our tired minds and bodies, just slumped in to bed to sleep...piercing the darkness, will come a request for prayer.... followed by a chorus of "Jesus" and "Amen" from Jamie....

Let us continue to pray and remember to talk to God...

Joshua Chang

A few days back, as I was taking my nephew Joshua (brother of Jonathan) to school, he asked me, "When we pray to Jesus, does he come down from heaven to help people?"

Well, as I tried to find the right words to explain in a way that he can understand, he continued to ask, "How can Jesus help my baby Jonathan?".

I said, "Jesus is everywhere around us, but we cant see him", pointing to the tree shrubs beside the cars that were moving to the breeze, and explained further that we can feel Jesus around us but we can't see him - like the wind.

He confidently replied, "Yes I know - sometimes, Jesus comes into my brains and talk to me and help me also..."

amused, I asked him, "how Jesus looks like....Who is more handsome? Jesus or your daddy?". He promptly replied "My daddy!"

Precious moments to pass on Jesus.....

Jonathan 7 July

Dear Prayer Partners,

Praise the Lord that Jonathan appetite has improved. He is eating well the past 2 days. Do continue to pray that he will continue to eat well and drink water readily.

The doctors have examined him and have given the green light for Jonathan to commence the second session of chemo. This is scheduled to commence today (7 July 2006) for about 72 hours. Do pray for Jonathan as he goes through this second session of chemo treatment. Pray that he will respond well to the chemo treatment and that the chemo will do the work of reducing the cancer cells. Pray for God's healing hands to be upon Jonathan.

Do uphold Lawrence, Joanne and Joshua in prayer as well. Pray for the strength from the Lord as they go through this difficult period.

Jonathan 1 July Update

UPDATE:

We have received some great news. Today tests have shown that cancer cells have reduced! Also, haemoglobin and platelet have increased significantly!

The doctor thinks that Jon is responding well to the chemo following the positive results. Praise GOD!

Continue to pray for his recovery and 2nd chemo session

Jonathan 30 June Update

Dear Friends,

Thank you for praying for Jonathan.

Here is some more update from today's checkup with the doctor:

1. Today's checkup revealed that his haemoglobin and platelet count is very low and needed blood and platelet transfusion. This was done today and we want to thank those who volunteered. THANK YOU.
2. He also has a fungal infection in the throat due to tube and the lack of drinking water.
3. He also has ulcers in the mouth
4. He does not want to eat at all and he also refuses oral liquid, medicine and food - so all food, medicine and water has to be fed through feeding tube.
5. He is readmitted back into the hospital for treatment and observation. Need to be there for a week.
   
6. He still has fever and high blood pressure.
7. His mood isnt too good either and is very traumatised by the treatment so far.
8. He is also begining to shed hair
   
9. He doesn't like visitors, doctors and nurses....
10. Continue to pray for Lawrence's father who is undergoing treatment for tumor in the bladder.
11. Next Chemo session = 10 July.

Jonathan

The part of having kids that I hate most - as it dawned upon me - is when they get sick with a very serious illness - so many things that are out of your hands or control...

My nephew, Jonathan, was diagnosed with a cancerous tumor in the stomach (neuroblastoma) at the tender age of 2. It is never a good time anytime to contract cancer BUT at 2??? The poor kid had to undergo a battery if tests within the first 24 hours of detection of the growth that includes, a biopsy, a bone marrow test, a bone scan, a CT scan, blood test and urine tests.....

He had been having mild fever for the the past 4 weeks. No other major symtoms that should alarm any of us - but he was admited into hospital for tests and observation and the doctors could nt find anything wrong with him. X-ray, UltraSound tests, blood tests and urine test did not find anything wrong with him - so he was just given anti-biotics to suppress the fever.

Last week, it was suggested that a second opinion should be seeked, and so to another doctor, at another hospotal he went - NObody would have been prepared for what's to come.

The pedeatrian discovered a lump in the abdomen the size of a lemon - and immediatly called for an ultra-sound - and he found that the grwoth was bigger - 14cm x 7cm! - almost the complete size of the stomach. An operation to remove it is not an option due to its size but a biopsy was immediately called for - although the doctor and the onchologist was already painting a very bad picture.

Within 24 hours, Jon was subjected to the torturous battery of tests to diagnose the situation properly. It is now confirmed that it is cancerous and that the 3rd rib bone at the back had been infected. Praise God though, that the Bone Marrow is clean. This will enable a Stem Cell transplant to be done later to help in his recovery.

At the time of writing, Jon has completed his first 72 hour Chemotheraphy session at the hospital. He will also be returning home today (24/6) to recuperate at home before his next Chemo session on 10 july.

His appetite is not very good, although he does ask for food - but he eats very little and he is very undernourished. The doctors has put him on drips and a feeding tube inserted to enable fluid and nutrients to be injected into his body. He also has tubes inserted into his veins for the purpose of administering drugs as part of the chemo theraphy. He has lost a lot of weight and generally his moods arent too good. He is very afraid of the nurses and doctors and would refuse to eat his oral medication. His blood pressure is also high (100s/150s) and still has a fever.

Hopefully, returning home wil put him more at ease and will help improve his appetite, moods, blood pressure and that he will take his medication. Due to Chemo, his immune system is also very low and is very susceptible to infections - so the parents have a lotto do to keep him safe, healthy, and monitored... Growing pains...

Please help pray for little Jonathan Chang.

Me Part 2

The long awaited part 2? Well.... before my memories start to fail me and my muscle limbs start to laze in the sun, I thought it best to write my case and leave behind my legacy for my kids.... (ok so I don't need to explain but to write something about meself is always .... interesting... LOL)

I ended Part 1 with something about me sister - I guess it will be nice to start with her too.... Well, she came into the family as the youngest grandchild on both side of the family. The little princess was precious and with a name that means "grace", it speaks much about the hopes of my parents back then. It was God's grace to bring her into our lives... although I don't necessary share that thought at that time...(LOL) ... but she was cool. We were playmates; we will run through the house on the wooden floorboards making as much noise as possible; we would play with our friendly neighbours; we would play with our mini zoo....

At 6, I was ready for school and I was enrolled in the best Kindie School in the whole of Ipoh - St. Michael - and spent the wee mornings getting ready for school and play. I could still remember (the pictures did help) how I, in my purplish sweater and black short pants, posed in pictures for my first day of school - "Hey! I am old enough to go to school! YEH!" Never did I once thought I have to do that - everyday - for another 20 years!!! It was a conspiracy - I don't remember signing one bit of any contract that bound me to go to school!!! But I did - obediently as I possibly could - I endured and enjoyed the best 20 years of my life!

A life without worries - a life without qualms - food on the table when you want it, or when you don't - free toys - NO bills - NO need to make decisions - The costs? Well, student life cost me not a single cent but it came with a price - homeworks, exams, tuitions, no TV, no late nights, no parties, naggings, naggings, naggings, naggings - did I mentioned naggings?

But it was cool.

I enjoyed every bit of my student life.

I breezed through kindie. The only time I got a whacking (or at least one that is still in my memory) was when I was playing this "pretend cycling" on the floor with my one other friend and suddenly somewhere from the top, a sudden quick swift of a cane came swatting down on our legs - OUCH!!! And that was the end of our little game.... Other than that - the only record I have of my kindie life is a smudged class photo... but I still do remember some old friends that graduated with me to primary school - I remembered Hong Kin, Chee Kin, Bremma, ..... ok so I am bad with names.... but I should try and find that old photo again..... and try with the names again!

I also remembered y parents giving me a choice as to which school I would like to go for my primary education - I chose ST.MICHAEL'S INSTITUTION! (over ACS of cos!!!) and there I went for another 6 years.

I went to SMI 2 and the first 3 years was pretty drabby

• I remembered squatting by the corridors learning to brush our teeth - we have this dentist clinic in the school compound and so we have to have this regular yearly checkup (which I don't remember going to) and this "basic training course" of brushing teeth - so we will all squat in a straight line along the corridor by the drain and we, equipped with our mug and toothbrush, will follow the "nice" dental nurse who will brush this gigantic teeth that she holds ( I remembered we joked about which dinosaur or monster she got those teeth from...)
• I remembered I was in 1C, 2C, 3C - the classrooms that I was in, and these 3 classrooms were very near the Headmaster's and Teacher's room.
• I remembered attending "catholism class" where a Catholic brother will come and tell us bible stories - that was fun - as I would always, almost every time, know the ending of the story and will help finish the story (that's for paying attention in Sunday School!!! ahem!)
• I remembered we use to pay only 15cent for a small plate of chee cheong fun and for 5 cent, we can have 2 sweets or a sticker!
  
• I remembered standing on my chair for not remembering my multiplication tables!
• I remembered using my fingers to remember the 9x multiplicaiton table
• I remembered sitting on the floor chatting while the teacher was teaching and having chalk pellets thrown at my head (the teacher's accuracy was amazing!! even with a full length distance of 20m, the teacher will hit the student with an amazing 95% accuracy!) I remember getting a mouthful of chalk too when I got hit with a duster! (those days, the used a "cloth" duster" that was bound tightly and stapled together - it doesn't hurt but you are bound to get a white face from it!
  

The next 3 years of of primary school was more fun - I was in 4C and that was when sports was my favorite - it was 1982 when I enjoyed my first World Cup (Spain) and football became my first love. Liverpool was the coolest team then.... and still is today - This was also the first time I was allowed to stay late, or wake up in the wee mornings to watch football!!! (cool dad I had!!),.... and thus began my affections and love for football. Every evening, I would be on the football pitch behind my house.... i would become one of the best in class and House but never made the school team ... I think it was because they played me out of position!!! (hmmm...) but I remembered scoring goals, running up and down the flanks..... it was cool..

And of course, I participated in every game and sports event there is.... badminton, sepak takraw, athletics, ..... and would come back with trophies and medals... I would do well in exams too... I knew I was an avegare student in my first 3 years but std 4 onwards, I would be among the tops in class and among the top 10/20 in the standard.... I was made prefect in std 5 and 6... some fond memories:

• I remembered getting top marks and having to stand in front of the entire school to get my "book" prize"
• I remembered leading the school in singing the national anthem every other day during assembly - I think I was one of the committee members on the prefect board back then (??).
• I remembered playing football and running barefooted!
• I remembered waking up early on saturday (it is extra-curricular activities day) and it was to be the earliest day of the week that I would wake up - at 6am - and without the parents waking me up- and I would take a public bus to school at 6.15am in order to reach the school by 6.30am to be the first to reach the badminton court to "book the court". We had an unwritten rule - whoever hangs his badminton net on the court first, gets to play first and gets to choose the players who can play on the court - needless to say, yours truly are almost king for a day most of the time.....
• I remembered haing to "babysit" the smaller students when the teacher have to have teachers meeting and we would have 2-3 prefects writing down names on the blackboard (yes - the boards were black back then!).
• I remembered one of my best friend then, and my class partner - Rozali - he shit on his pants in school!
• I remembered starting wearing my nerdy glasses when i was 10!
• I remembered sitting next to the doors of the classroom and would be among the first to dash out during recess time to book the "concrete courts" outside our classroom to play "kong kuan" aka "galah panjang" or "tan kuek" aka "one leg hop" and those were days we accumulated our battle scars from "flying" across the court to tag the opposition. I was one of the best at "tan kuek" back then - fast, agile, and I even had my trademark "flying tactic" to leave behind... so I was always the popular ones that everyone wanted on their team!
• I remembered doing the "rhyming selection" to choose teams for "police and thieves" or for team games....
• I remembered catching spiders at the school garden hedges to "fight" with other friends' spiders.
• I remembered being a librarian in a storeroom like library where we only allow book borrowing - love the job as I loved reading - of course I have first access to all the "Hardy Boys" and "Nancy Drew" mystery and detective books... I remembered hiding some of the books in special hiding places so that others could not find them or borrow them until I get a chance to read them first - we had a quota as to how many books you can borrow at any one time. I remembered the joy of having my first library card at the Public library where my dad would take me there once a week. (The public library would turned out to be one of my favourite places to be in!)
  
• I remembered some ghost stories about the Ugama classroom and the library - some headless japanese soldiers... more of this next time...
• I remembered they built the new teachers room during my time there
• I remembered my teacher calling my parents to come to school because i did not write my "u" properly - always leaving the final stroke down - and was penalised for it by having all the words with "u" marked as wrong in my dictation test until my teacher had a word with my parents - eventually my test result was marked as 98%!
• I remembered singing to "Beat it" and "Karma chameleon" after their grammy award wins.
• I remembered playing "Five Stones", "Bottle Caps","chongkak", "Liu Chai", "Sting Bomb", "Rubber Band guns & pellets" and "hide&seek"
  

Hmmm.... maybe I should find some time to write about these childhood games.... maybe next time...

yah.... next time....

Me Part 1

In between sharing my own kids' growing pains, I felt I should also pen down memories of my past... so here goes nothing....

4th June

I was born in a small town called Batu Gajah. It's a little town about 45 mins away from Ipoh (those days without the convenience of a highway). My dad wasn't around to see me when I was born. Got called for a training outstation and, apparently, I wasn't suppose to be out so soon... Anyway, I got out early (no fuss about it, dad) and gave my mum a lot of joy (ahem - I am after all , the eldest and first in my family. I am also the eldest grandchild on my mum's side!) So naturally, I am my grandpa's (and grandma's) favourite grandson (Oh, did I mention that I have a younger sister and there was only two of us on my mum's side? I didn't? well, now you know; not that this fact matters much.)

Moving to Ipoh

I spent my early toddler age in the government quarters in the hills in Batu Gajah, before we shifted to Ipoh (I believe it was somewhere in Shatin Park, Pasir Puteh ***c'mon, gimme a break - I am writing this down from memory something that happened decades ago!***) That was not for a very long time, hence the lack of memories of the place and we all shifted to Greentown (still in Ipoh). My dad got a place in a Semi-D, kampung style govt house (the ones with concrete stilts and wooden walls). We have a great playing field just outside my house with two tennis courts at the end of the "football size" playing field. We have a nice little garden on our side courtyard where we kept our chickens and rabbits and dogs, and whatever pets I had those days... The toilet? It's at the back of the house of course - it was stil the bucket-system then (I think? Never really remembered visiting the facility as I was still very young and I do most of my hygienic activities at the side courtyard (which was fenced up by a 6ft zink wall) or at my trusty portable bowl.

I am already begining to lose these memories of my past as I grow older and have my own kids and own life to live. Hence, I am penning this down and, when I do have the time, I hope to go back down memory lane to verify and search for my past... As it is already, my house in Greentown is no longer there - in its place it's the towering Menara DBI (Dewan Bandaraya Ipoh).

I could still vaguely remember the fun times I had in that house, and I hope to get hold of my old photos and will post it up (as soon as I get it) .

My first childhood story would be that of my dog - Tiny. He wasn't like tiny at all, as the name may imply. In fact, he is a large "sheepdog-like" breed. Not sure what you really called it but it's those type that has hair that covers the eyes.... He was white in color (suppose to be white but we will call it golden white nowadays). He was the first dog I could remember having or that I could call MY dog - of course my dad takes care of him as I was only 3 then...

Most memorable incident about Tiny:

Well, I had pet rabbits (2 or maybe 3) and I also had those cute colourful chicks (prob half a dozen or something...) and we were like (as the story goes) woke up one day and found half the chicks gone... and we started looking for it (my dad and mum and grandma) but coud not find a trace of it. Next thing we know, another one went missing ...ohoh.... "TINY!!!", shouted my dad... and off he went chasing the dog. In between all these, Tiny went after one of my pet rabbits, and chased him half way round the courtyard (as it somehow managed to sneak out from its' cage) and .... well, Tiny didn't bit it nor caught it.... the rabbit died anyway - heart attack - I was told. So Tiny was severely reprimanded when he was caught! But there goes 4 (couldn't count really as I was only 3!) chicks and 1 rabbit and 1 naugthy dog! But still, I think it was a fun day as my dad and mum still remembered that day!

Tiny was fun. Tiny was big, huggable, and lovable and brave. I remembered how he scared away the neighbour's geeses which came after me when I was like "out exploring"... But he was also very mischievious - One day, we got a complaint from the neighbour, that he saw Tiny stealing into his compund and chasing after his chickens (apparently he was succesful in catching one or some...) and so, because of that, I lost a dear friend.

My Dad had to give him up as he was just too naughty and we could not control him. Probably there were more reasons but I never asked that of my dad. There were no SCPA then and so, I still remembered how we had to take Tiny on a long car ride to a distant place and left him there. I couldn't understand why we had to leave him behind but as we drove away in my dad's old Volkswagen, I don't think I ever did cry. ...Not that I could remember... it must have been painful for my parents, especially my dad, for, according to my mum, he went back to the place to look for Tiny a few days after....***tears***

sigh.... incidentally, we had many dogs after that, but never one that looked like Tiny. Funnily, we had a lot of dogs that were named Tiny!!! like it was named in memory of Tiny??!!

The annoying sister

And so....anyway, my sis decided to popped into the family when I was 3+ and my best memory of that incident was.... I was not allowed into the hospital to visit my mum and my newborn sister. I had to wait in the car with my grandma who took turn with my dad and aunt to visit my mum and sister and at the same time, take care of me in the car!! mind you - no aircond then ok...!

So that was my sister....

ok... more of her next time then...and more about my childhood in the coming days.

Shut up or speak up?

My son talks a lot. In fact he talks and talks and talks and it's like the only time it is silence from him is when he sleeps and when he drinks his milk. He talks even when he eats! (and sometimes even when he sleeps).

There is so much a tendency and temptation for us to "shut him up" and allow not just for silence but for me and my wife to talk! But as I see many youths today, many have a tendency to "shut up" in front of their parents and it is the time for many parents to want them to "speak up".

Parents are not able to communicate with their children; They are talking but not communicating - and we wonder why?

Parents are not able to understand their children; They are talking but not understanding - and we wonder why?

Parents are not getting the support and respect from their children; They are talking but not respecting - and we wonder why?

So shall we let them speak up or shut up? Dilemma of the young parent.

First cane for the son

Dec 30, 2005 - that's the day, when I "caned" my son for the first time. It was for an "offence" most people would probably find that the "crime" do not warrant the punishment - the habit of biting finger nails - and so I caned him once on each hand.

We tried telling him and explaining to him the harms of biting finger nails - to no avail. We tried scolding him; we tried grounding him and traking his privilleges to toys and tv away from him; we tried putting him in the corner (we started isolating him in corners since he was 1+ and old enough to understand discipline. very effective and it works); we smacked his fingers (till our own hands hurt); so next step was to go for the cane.

I have searched through the web for solution to getting him off the habit and most recommend putting on some bitter lotion/cream to discourage him. Will prob try looking in the local pharmacy stores and see. but so far 4 days on, he has not picked it up yet..... hope it worked.

But it was an equally painful experience for me, as I inspected his hands 10 minutes on (as I helped brushed his teeth) and I saw the reddish, cane-inflicted mark on the hand. It wasn't the tears or the sight of his winched face that disturbed me most but the sight of the mark and his recovered composure to "win back" my love that left the guilt and made me most traumatic of the whole incident. brave kid - 10 mins on, and he was smiling at me and trying to cuddle me. Although the mark left after about 30mins, I couldn't sleep well that night. I remembered the time my own dad caned me for leaving the car keys in the car and locked the whole family out while out at a relative's home. It was a very painful experience for me .... and I now know how difficult it was for my dad to do that too.... but I never left the keys back in the car ... ever again.

I hope I will not need to raise the cane on my son again. But if I have to, I pray that I may have the courage to do so - for the sake of my children.

Intro

I am now 33. I have a very loving and supportive wife and two kids. My eldest son is 4 (will be 5 in august 2006) and my youngest, a daughter will be 2 soon in May. Both me and my wife are working parents and so we sent the kids to a childminder during the day but we will have them with us in the evenings and weekends. We don't have a maid (freaked out by the horror stories that we have heard) and so in between raising the two kids, we are the drivers, housecleaners, maid/butler, breadwinner, tutor, cook, plumber, handyman, employee, business owner, church Deacon, Youth ministry leader, sunday school helper, and cockroach killer (I am the official one - the wife absolutely hates them!!) So busy, busy, busy is the word...... so how are are we coping? hmmm.... I guess that's what this blog is all about

I am starting this blog mainly to chart the growth of my kids (wished I had started earlier but I guess, anytime is a good time to start) and blog down some of the things I learned along the way in raising my kids. I guess, I wanted also a "diary" of some of the milestones and events that my kids goes thru and something the family can cherish in a long time to come.

It is also an avenue to share our lives with you guys and in the hope that we can learn from you guys as well.. so comments, advice and especially encouragements are most welcome.